Tipping

[chrizzy100]

quote:Originally posted by MTP

I agree completely with you about this being about tipping, but it is also based on the cultural differences to tipping and I think therefore has to encounter some discussion on cultural heritage. (Can of worms opened, but here goes).

A couple of interesting points are that you mention your English heritage, and I have no problem with that at all. My own ancestory is probably a mix of Scottish and Irish. But in your own post you describe yourself as a Brit and then English, I would rarely describe myself as British, but probably Scottish first. Admittedly your reply will be picking up on my previous thread. I have to say again, I just don't think the English (and this is in my limited experience) get the differeince between British and English. Many other countries also assume that if you are from the UK then you are English.

The other thing is that fact that you say that we do not get on well with the French, another example of by being English it is assumed that this heritage is for the whole UK. The French and Scottish have a long history of cooperation, known affectionately in Scotland as the Auld Alliance (sp?). It has a lot to do with Celtic heritage, and I found the attitude of the Welsh immediatedly changed towards me in Cardiff when they found out I was Scottish and not English, there is a kind of "All Celts together" attitude.

These are old traditions, passed down, perhaps without much relivance to the modern world or the economics of it. Unfortunately for the English, the Celtic countries are bonded by a common enemy!! This heritage can often actually do more harm than good, as many heritages can, passing down prejudices and grievances from one generation to the next, without any basis in genuine knowledge, thought or experiences.

I agree that this is a little heavy for this forum, especially with the positive people that post on this forum. Actually ithis forum is one of the few instances in the UK where I have found people who are open-minded and positive, like the American character is. This is part of the reason, however, that I made my postings to try and to explain our own attitude to tipping. Undoubtedly they do contain sweeping generalisations, and I apologise for these, and I again wish to re-state that I don't want to cause any offense to any of you good folks, just share our own opinions.

My nans family were very happy in her marrying a Scot....her family were french living in the UK.....but after his death she married about 5 years later an Englishman....and all hell broke out....she was cut off from all family money....and never saw most of her family till I was around 5.....its was OK to live in England but not marry anyone English......just thought I'd throw that in.....LOL

[MTP]

Isn't it funny, and perhaps a little sad, that our ancestory can seem so important in some ways, especially as something that Americans are charectiturised about searching out, and yet in other ways cause so many problems. Especialy when it comes down to which side of a nominal line you are born on.

We humans are a very bizarre species.

[chrisj]

Yep I agree we are a strange lot, but then if we were all the same wouldnt life be a bore.

Next year when I pop in to see chrizzy for the barbie, at least we will have a lot of subjects
to talk about.

I think the most important thing is to be able to discuss an issue without fear of ridicule and to also take the time to find others views and respect their views even if you do not agree
with them

thats what living alongside each other is all about. Well thats my opinion

[chrizzy100]

quote:Originally posted by chrisj

Yep I agree we are a strange lot, but then if we were all the same wouldnt life be a bore.

Next year when I pop in to see chrizzy for the barbie, at least we will have a lot of subjects
to talk about.

I think the most important thing is to be able to discuss an issue without fear of ridicule and to also take the time to find others views and respect their views even if you do not agree
with them

thats what living alongside each other is all about. Well thats my opinion

I'm a mind of useless info Chris.....I can talk about anything..and for a very long time....LOL.....

[Chris7]

I find all this facinating, particularly chrizzy's research, but: "People may feel less guilt because of that. I don't feel bad that a chef cooked me a meal, but I do feel bad that a waiter had to serve it to me."

I agree with the personal service bit, but I'm uncomfortable with tipping because it seems to perpetuate a "class" divide. I remember eating in a posh resteraunt in Atlanta and while we ate, a very elderly coloured guy came round the tables shining peoples shoes. Some of my coleagues found it funny that some bloke who looked (and spoke) like the one off the Uncle Ben's advert should be grovelling on the floor shining shoes while we ate - for me it just left me cold at a level of racism which wouldn't be tollerated over here.

Following that argument, why do you tip a coach driver (who hasn't given you any personal service), but not a nurse? No one would suggest (in the UK) that a nurse is on the wages of a dentist (or opthamologist), and emptying bed pans etc is about as personal service as you can get[}] I'm sure there are many nurses who take home far less that waiters.

[Kissyme]

Chris 7
Speaking as a nurse we are not allowed to accept money as a "thankyou"
but chocolates and a card are fine. Having said that it is mainly Nurses who patients see that get the cards and chocs not the ones out of the public eye (which goes back the waiter/chef thing) I work in a busy theatre suite and sometimes stay up all night working or an hour or two after my shift has finnished which I do gladly but because we never or rarely get to see the relatives we are kind of invisible. Also the care recieved on the ward if for a much longer period in time. As a side note I personally find tipping a bit daunting so leave it to hubbie we have always recieved superb service in Florida and don`t mind saying thankyou with $

[bellaepovera]

The bloke that was shining shoes in Atlanta does not have to do it if he chooses not too. Servers have to declare 8% of their tips and at some resturaunts due to lack of tips, especially at the hotel buffets add automatic 15% is added on to your bill. Those tips are automatically declared on the servers taxes and also the servers have to tip the busboy at the end of their shift 10% of what they make.
I would not have tipped the car rental guy either for showing me where my car is. Never heard of that!!

[fiona]

I too wouldn't expect to tip anyone to pick up my rental car, but I would tip at a restaurant whatever the price was, unless the service was diabolical.

This is the Scot speaking (¾ Scot, ¼ English) married to an Englishman (¾ English, ¼ Scot) with British children (½ English, ½ Scot)!!!! - and somewhere way back there's some Irish in me as well

[chrisj]

I dont know if he expected a tip, he might have been waiting to see all was well. Just
something my Wife mentioned as I was busy packing the cases in the boot and getting out
the driving instructions.

Dont need them next year we know the way now. I seem to have started something here about
nationality hehehe

On a side note I think nurses do a grand job and should be payed more, I would gladly pay
more tax if I knew it was going to them

[bellaepovera]

Yes i agree with you on the nurseing pay. They are so underpaid in America and tend not to take care of the patients as they are overworked and not enough of them to be had. Especially at the retirement homes. Nurses aides-forget it, they get only min. wage!! And they do so much!!